Chapter 29
The brain is such an amazing miracle and revelation of science. It’s ability to spawn, create, move, diagnose, react, and send signals with billions of particles of information to our body in a nanosecond is unmatched. As a normal human, we don’t give ourselves enough credit, and we move about our day unrealizing how incredible we truly are. Enter the demands of the day. What a 2024 human being deals with is completely different than any other generation, because our own process offers opportunities for over stimulation, when we are chasing the shadows of what we think is a productive day. Even in our basic form, what someone thinks is an unproductive day, could have been considered an unbelievable task load for previous generations.
In my world, as is many of you reading this, I wake up at the crack of dawn before the rooster crows, and take on the responsibility of getting my kids up and prepared for their days at school, make breakfasts, check in and support a live-in grandparent who in the last few years has been taken hostage by dementia, which has highly affected her physical and mental well being. As if this isn’t a huge responsibility, I still have to make sure I am prepared for my own personal day, and get ready for work as a Middle School Teacher, who by the way is on nine different leadership committees between my school site and school district. I also am a second career educator, so I have shed my identity of the past, and have to follow state rules of clearing my credential through a process called Induction which is a two year period of research and implementation under a microscope of inquiry data, designed projects, analysis, and reflection of practice that I have to document an submit to the state for approval. Within this, I also am a grad student finishing my Masters in Education with a focus of Theory and Design in Curriculum. This is before my day even starts. With all of these blessings, I have to then not only manage my load, but I have to do it with fidelity and integrity. In other words, I don’t want to just execute it, I want to make sure that I am the absolute best version of myself trying to help others in the process. While this is the ultimate positive perspective, I have noticed that the demands of the world continue to just grow.
For some of you, you may feel this similar weight I carry. At no time am I resentful, or upset, or anything indifferent to my responsibilities. However, there are some times I feel like the negative shadows are lurking to take advantage of your condition. These are the “nasties” of the world that don’t care about you. They are the self fulfilling, judgmental, narrow minded individuals that have allowed for themselves to be chained to a leash that they have imprisoned who they are, and need to feel a sense of control in order to feel like they have something to hold on in this world. Unfortunately, there are so many of these people, they have infiltrated our society in the way we work and operate our social structure. While I think we all believe this isn’t true, I have been witness to who seem like the nicest people, but when you see them in action, they bring with them the darkness and shadows that hide these behaviors. They are like what my friend Jon Gordon calls “Energy Vampires”, where they suck everything out of you and drain you until there is nothing left that resembles who you are. They are entangled within this mindset, so they have to leash up others around them and hold them hostage. We don’t even realize it is happening because that one person just “needs a favor”, but their favor is at every turn and passively attached to a judgment that causes you anxiety if you don’t comply. How about another one keeps you at bay because they understand your goals, ambitions, and desires, but yet you feel like you have to fulfill their needs in order to fill yours. It is such a wicked place to be. There are people out there that can see through the shadows. Maybe they were a victim once or over a period of time. Maybe there are multiple vampires that have leashed to a chain pulling you in all types of directions. Work, school, priorities, social expectations, and life pressures all exist in multiple ways and you are tied down to it because you believe you have to be. You do not. This way of thinking stretches and bends your thinking and understanding into ways that your brain, heart, and soul should not have to be bent to. This “Neuroplastic Leash” can get so tight that eventually you snap apart, and those shadows see that you are broken and move on to the next victim. At this point, the only person left is yourself and your ability to pick up your own shattered pieces.
Why do we do this to ourselves? Why do we live in someone else’s vision? With all the pressure we already have, why do we put so much pressure on this altruistic success? Why are we imprinting false narratives on our own existence and allowing the demand of others to supersede our own? Why do we place so much importance on how people look or think about us, when all we need to do is live our own passion and purpose in the way we are gifted to do so? We can only stretch so far until we hurt ourselves mentally and spiritually, but who wants that to happen? When we give our control away, we are giving permission for others to do this. No more. You have to stand up and confidently make peace with anything that does not allow you to value, appreciate, love, and/or bring joy to your life. Give yourself permission to be that person. There are so many people in this world that tell you many ways you can’t, and there is only one person deep inside that is telling you that you CAN! It is time to be that person. Nobody can tell you what you can do with what you are capable of doing except yourself. You need to empower your inner being and take off the leash that has stretched you in the sake of others’ selfish well being. No more are you attached to the former way of thinking. Time to break the cycle. Time to live the life you want. Time to breathe the fresh air of your existence. Take what is yours today and give to others freely because it fulfills you, not them! Inspire others to breathe their own air, and break their negative cycle! Give freely, love immensely, and be strong enough to speak up when you need to. It is okay to live this type of life. You are meant to have this. You will find your spirit will awaken and be a positive influence to others. While this may seem really over the top, it is only because those who haven’t experienced it yet don’t fully understand the happiness that you are generating and experiencing. We are not talking about denying others, not giving to others, or pouring into other people – You must free yourself first before you can free others; you must help yourself before you can truly help others. It doesn’t make sense to say you can achieve something, when you haven’t experienced it yourself first. When you do this, you become a beacon in which others can follow the light that you shine for them to find a way out.
What are different things in your life you are leashed to? What are things you are trapped in and wish were different? Consider all these things and make a change. You are allowed that. Fear will try to keep you in the shadows. Fear only has power when you don’t understand. If you understand what you want and how to get there, and all the dynamics to get to your goals and live the life you always envisioned, then fear will not exist in your world. How will it feel to free yourself? How will it feel to show others they can do it too? I challenge you today to give to yourself and the world the better version of you. If we could all do this, how different would our world be?
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Written By Chris Hulme ( aka – Coach Hulme ) #CoachHulme #ChrisHulme #TheHulme
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Coach Hulme 
Best one, yet!I say that because my motto has always been: Take No Prisoners. By that, I mean, rid yourself of toxic people [which I think is basically what you’re saying here]. Sometimes life forces you to interact with destructive people – be civil, at arm’s length, and don’t let them hug you. We don’t need a ton of “friends”, just a few, whom we trust, with whom we enjoy fun things.
Regards to Kathy. Does she even remember who I am?
Sheree Lowsen
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