Chapter 33
Not that anyone of us doubts ourselves in life, but we do have our moments of confusion. I would definitely say I have a healthy inner-self and understand my personal mission and goals, but sometimes we get shaken in our conviction. It could happen for various reasons, and it is extremely discomforting to have these thoughts. To be honest, it is quite humbling to our inner selves to admit we may question ourselves at times.
Recently, I know someone who was super successful and thriving at their job. They got along with their peers, had great relationships with co-workers and led successful initiatives among their branch. They had been with the company for just a few years and would be considered a transformative employee. One day the boss brought the employee into the office and said they were transferring them to another location within the company because of numbers.
After a few months at the new location, the once vibrant employee was in a rut and felt like they were wasting their talents. The barrier to break through was hard because all of the other employees kept to themselves. The culture was that of closed doors, rather than a collaborative environment. Communication was difficult because there was no direct line due to multiple individual projects keeping attention away from the collective whole. While the individual was seemlessing accomplishing their workload, something was missing. This mundane environment was draining and left the worker feeling isolated and out of place. Their job now became a task and not something of value. They felt like all the training, experience, and value meant nothing and found themselves questioning their value to the company. In the initial meetings of transfer, the former boss even recommended to the new manager that they were a high performer and could easily offer additional help and a fresh perspective to boost production at the new location. Unfortunately after months of inaction, the employee was frustrated and shared with their spouse at home. The employee began to express self doubt and the direction and purpose began to become murky because there were not defined boundaries or areas to be involved since everyone seemed to be independently driven in their work.
Does this sound similar to anyone’s life right now? I hear stories like this all the time with a twist here or there, but similar circumstances. Why is it like this? It is blatantly obvious that the employee is like a fish out of water, and that they need to be challenged in a way that matches their competency and talents. I believe it is unfortunate that these scenarios exist because it is a waste of value, and what is even more depreciating is the fading confidence of those that have to suffer through a process similar to this. I actually brought this up with my wife last week, and she brilliantly quoted an anonymous fable of “Knowing Your Worth”. In short, use whatever physical example you like here, but the story goes something along the lines of the father giving the son his old dusty car from their storage garage and tells him to go sell it to put money away for his future. The son takes the car to the local garage and they offer him pennies on the dollar to haul away the car because it doesn’t run and finding the pieces to make it run would cost more than what he is offering. The son then tried to take the car to the local car dealership and they offered him $3000 dollars to take it off his hands because of the condition, and that the new owner would have to sink and invest a lot of additional time and money to fix it up. Frustrated with both offers, the son returns to the father and tells him about the two offers and the father asks him to go to the local car show and try once again. To his surprise, the son came back to his dad stating he had multiple offers from collectors of over $100,000. The dad then revealed that what looked like junk was actually something valuable, but it took the right situation and the right people to see through obstacles and barriers to view its true value. He told his son, don’t ever settle, but find a place and people that value and appreciate you and you will be a rich man in more ways than one. As we can all see this story has been told with a watch, plate, or other examples but the lesson was the same, find where people value your contributions and understand your true worth.
In our everyday lives, we waddle in self pity and we have moments of doubts, but we need to remember how special and unique each one of us is and what we bring to the world. Whether it is a job, a relationship, being part of a team, we all have a value that needs to be shared with the world. Do not waste your time, efforts, and sensibility on those that can’t recognize your worth. Be strong enough to find a spot that accepts you for this. We sometimes dream that if we go here or there, it will be a dream come true. Sometimes what we believe may not be what we imagined, and the truth sets us on a different path. If our goal is to discover ourselves, when we find it, we need to appreciate it and be one with it to protect it. Some people spend their whole life looking for acceptance and belonging when they may have already achieved it. Each person needs to help themselves love who they are and value that as a part of their self worth. Your worth isn’t about an endless list of achievements and checked boxes, it is about coming to find out how you love yourself and appreciate the process of finding contentment in your ability to help yourself and others in this world.
Be gentle and kind to yourself. Be patient and understanding. Faithfully extending yourself to your best abilities and realizing that you can do these things, no matter what the outcome is, is really valuable for any person to do in this world. If every human could do these simple things, our world would be a more amazing place for everyone to exist.
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Written By Chris Hulme ( aka – Coach Hulme ) #CoachHulme #ChrisHulme #TheHulme
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Coach Hulme 