Chapter 11
My Funny Valentine.
You ever have one of those days you just don’t want to end? It feels like the best day you have ever had? Oh man. This Valentine’s Day was one of those.
I don’t know about you, but my life is full of controlled chaos. I am maniacal about organization and every minute has its purpose down to this last second. My wife and I have created this way of life over many years of being crazy busy and making a house full of kids, jobs, and everything that the world throws at us work.
This year, happens to be a huge year of growth for our family. The Pandemic played a huge role in the landscape of our jobs and school. The kids are home, the wife works her 50+ Hours a week, my almost full time job with Grad School laying it’s forces down with some type of research paper or project from each class every week. This semester it happens to be three classes, so imagine balancing this lifestyle: job, kids, family, and school with three research papers every week… it’s a unique challenge that is hidden by my outgoing and easy flowing personality I portray in public and social media. To be honest, the positivity I try to share is it’s own therapy to me for the expectations I try to hold myself accountable to.
This whole concept brings me to today’s story… a love story, so to speak. While I share my story with you, the details aren’t within my story itself, but the perspective and lesson that the story brings.
What if… you only had 24 hours left? What would you do? Who would you spend it with? What is the realistic possibility??? In my case, I am not a millionaire or anywhere close, and my time is the only true treasure I can spend. It’s not like I am going to get on a plane a fly halfway across the world and spend 10 hours getting to some remote destination to die. Realistically speaking, I am going to give my whole being and everything I am to my kids. I have to believe that the day would live forever with them and it would be a gift everyday for the rest of their lives. Without getting too serious, today was this day I hope they remember for a long time.
I got up early so when they woke up, I could greet them and welcome them into the new day. We watched church together as a family because we know where are blessings come from. We decided to surprise the kids and take them out to a special park where we could go ride these cool four pedal bikes and share a new adventure. We drove together out to Orange County and while we were in the car, I turned down the music so I could hear their little voices tell me all about their adventures this week. Normally people will turn the radio up and listen to music, and while that is very fun, I thought it was important to be in the moment with them and have them share what is on their mind. I believe it helps validate themselves and make them feel appreciated that someone would care enough to listen to them. As a parent, we have these crazy lives and sometimes, we just need a break, but not me. I realize these precious moments will be gone way too quick, and if I don’t take advantage of them now, most likely wishing to have more later in the future when that may not be a possibility. Take advantage of the now.
When we got to the park, we were a little hungry and stopped at the snack bar and grabbed a drink and a corn dog. Not because the corn dog is super healthy or that we were trying to fill our belly, but because it was a moment we could share with them getting them a special treat that wasn’t outlandish. It’s something we got to do together. As we made our way to the bike rentals, the kids were nervous because they had never rode on one of these and it was quite intimidating. Instead of giving into the fears of the unknown, I let them know that there were no expectations, and just trying something new with the ones you love is such a blessing. I reassured them not worry and that Mommy and Daddy would be by their side through it all. As we rode around the park, we pulled off to take a family picture. Not because I needed to share it on our social media, but because when my kids look back on that same social media years later, the picture will help them remember the adventure we took together and understand that the very moment we had, the present, was the gift within itself.
There are so many other little moments and experiences, but as you can see it’s all about perspective. You have to have the ability to cherish the normal or little things, and when you do that they actually become very big things.
One story I will share with you is my funny valentine. We were a few minutes into our ride, with a kid’s excited heart, Benny asked from the backseat, “Can I Drive?” I don’t think Holly or Kathi was even expecting my answer, but my answer was a resounding “Sure!” …and just like that our little guy drove us around the park all afternoon. There were so many laughable moments, and it made for the funniest experience ever. But I am so glad that my wife and I were able to pour into our kids and allow them have this experience. We even had a point in our adventure where our legs slipped through the bottom of the cart on the bike and we were thrown back into the “stone age” like the Flintstones with our legs moving the bike forward from under us!!! Benny almost fell through the bottom… while it sounds not so funny, it was hilarious and we all had a good time with it! Because we had built that confidence and reassurance with them, guess who dusted themselves off and got right back in the driver’s seat??? You guessed it… Benny!
Isn’t that what life is all about? As I share this story with you, some may not still see the big picture here. After building these kids up and when the ride got a little bumpy, did they stop? No! They got back up. When they were first nervous, did they give into the fear and not try something new? No! They tried it, and accomplished a new adventure! …and at every possible moment where they needed support or care, was someone there to build them up? Yes! We tried our best!
I know that not everyone in their life may have these experiences. Maybe no one did that for you and poured into you and helped you, or took the time with you, but guess what??? That doesn’t mean you can’t do it for someone else. You are the gift! A lot of people want things for themselves. I used to have that mentality, but something changed when I realized that giving and making other people feel their best, made me feel my best!!! It makes quite a unique perspective to live by!
While I know many didn’t have a “Valentine” this year, but maybe, if you buy into “this helping others idea”, you are the valentine that someone else so desperately needs. Whether it’s a loved one or just a friend, think about how you can significantly impact how special they feel on this day? That can be you creating all of this incredible magic for someone!
Now, we said at the beginning that you only had one day. This would have been a great day, right? Here is where the real magic happens… What if you could strive to bring this gift every day? Not just this one day a year… but try to spend everyday with this mentality as it was your last? Your life would be filled with so much immense joy, and I know that someone else’s life would too!
I hope you all have a blessed Valentine’s Day! Thank you for sharing your moment with me so I could try to help!
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Written By Chris Hulme (aka – Coach Hulme) #CoachHulme #ChrisHulme
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